See you soon :)

Struggled to finish all my assignments today. Why? Because...I’ll be on leave tomorrow until next Monday!!! Woohooooooo....

Not that I’ll be going anywhere special. Just have to finish off my annual leave which is about 14 days left. The balance of 11 days I'll take towards the end of December, which means a much longer break. Yippee...If I’m bored at home, I might just decide to go somewhere at the spur of the moment. *yeah right, that is so not me....*

The truth is, I do feel kind of guilty because we are at a busy stage to complete a particular initiative by the end of December. So, depends la if boss bagi green light to take the long leave later. If not, I might have to donate back my cuti to the company. Sob..sob..but, hey...can I claim from the company if I can't finish off my annual leave?

But then again, I do need a break. After all, I didn’t get to enjoy my raya holidays. When everyone was already in the raya mood during the last week of puasa, yours truly was busy completing the department’s budget. So, I do deserve this short break jugak..kan..kan...kan? Takpelah, I’m sure my two lovely bosses can survive without me.

Take care darlings...If I rajin, I’ll visit the blog at home. Hope you guys have a great time at work. Miss me ok? *wink, wink*.

Just one of them days...

*Trueblue is shivering*. Haiyaa...What a cold and wet Monday morning! The office seems to feel much colder too. I don’t like Mondays and am not in the best of moods to work at the moment. Looking at the gloomy weather outside also doesn’t really help boost up my energy level. *sigh*

You know, I was reading The Malay Mail on Saturday and saw this interesting article.

"A study of 250,000 employees in London found that job satisfaction influenced mental health in particular. Workers who are unhappy in their jobs are more likely to experience emotional burnout, have reduced self-esteem and suffer from anxiety"

Haha..Sounds familiar! I wouldn’t say I hate my job but I’m not exactly in love with it either. I realised after marriage, my interest in work got lesser and after having D*, the feeling got even worse. I’m not sure if its this current work that I don’t enjoy or just working in general. I want the pay..I mean, I’m used to getting my own money and not having to depend too much on anyone else. I still want to be able to buy my own things without having to ask for the money. Maybe its a simple job that I want. Something that requires less thinking, less pressure..An 8 to 5 job perhaps? I remembered conversations about wanting easy jobs like a receptionist or a dancer :) Remember this, concreterose? There were even times when we concluded that our dream job is to be a housewife. Punyalah malas nak kerja. Baik tak payah belajar tinggi-tinggi dulu kan? I guess if we were really interested in our work, we wouldn't have felt that way.

I so envy those people who are really in love with their job...people who are so eager to go to work. It must be a great feeling.. waking up every day and feeling so excited, so passionate to contribute to the company. For me, I just can’t wait for Fridays. Waiting for the day to be over so that I can enjoy my weekend. But weekends seem to always go by so fast, don’t you think? Without realising, its already Sunday night and you start feeling sad again..Its like, "Alamak...esok dah Monday...malasnya nak kerja!!!". The only thing that motivates me to go to work is the bunch of crazy friends I have. Breakfast time, lunch time and chit-chatting time are the things that I look forward to do.

You guys must think I’m so bad and so pathetic. Hehe...Nolah, I’m ok. No use complaining. Kerja kena ikhlas.. if not, it wouldn’t seem right to spend the money we get. Besides, if it was really that bad, I would have done something about it ages ago. I just focus on the good things in life. Better just enjoy what I’m doing or else I’ll end up bitching about every single thing in this office. Maybe because its Monday and I’m already feeling the work tension for the next 4 days. Remember the 20 suggestions for success? Well, I better start concentrating on suggestion number 2 :)

Oh God..Boss just called my name. Better go see what he wants..Later guys......

Experiental Learning

Had a Mid Year Performance Review discussion with boss today. One of the topics was what I’ve learnt for the past 6 months in this new department. Suddenly I had a mental block and couldn’t think of anything impressive to say. Hehe...So, bantai je la. Anyway, back at my cubicle I started to think about what I’ve learnt for the past 30 years of my life. I immediately remembered a list I had on life learnings. Of course there are many learning experiences but going through the list, I chose the ones that have touched my heart and also those that have made a great impact to my life. These are either personal experiences or what I’ve seen happened to other people. This is the list..

I've learned-
That you cannot make someone love you.
All you can do is be someone who can be loved.
The rest is up to them.

I've learned-
That no matter how much I care,
Some people just don't care back.

I've learned-
That it takes years to build up trust,
And only seconds to destroy it.

I've learned-
That it's not what you have in your life
but who you have in your life that counts.

I've learned-
That you should always leave loved ones with loving words.
It may be the last time you see them.

I've learned-
That we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I've learned-
That sometimes when I'm angry,
I have the right to be angry,
but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I've learned-
That true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love.

I've learned-
That no matter how good a friend is,
they're going to hurt you every once in a while
and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned-
That it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others.
Sometimes you are to learn to forgive yourself.

I've learned-
That no matter how bad your heart is broken,
the world doesn't stop for your grief.

I've learned-
That our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are,
but we are responsible for who we become.

I've learned-
That just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other
And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I've learned-
That we don't have to change friends
if we understand that friends change.

I've learned-
That you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret.
It could change your life forever.

I've learned-
That two people can look at the exact same thing
and see something totally different.

I've learned-
That your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.

I've learned-
That even when you think you have no more to give,
when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

I've learned-
That it's hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice
and not hurting people's feelings and standing up for what you believe.

I've learned-
That we should not sacrifice our own feelings and easily want to do everything/
anything to please the person we love because he/she will take you for granted.

I've learned-
That no matter how unfortunate you feel your life is,
there are others whose lives are even worse.
Be thankful with what you have.


It’s true...Life is like a roller coaster. Many ups and downs. Many emotions felt along the way. Life ain’t easy. We make mistakes, learn from it and try not to repeat them. Know when and how to pick yourself up when things aren’t going your way....

20 suggestions for success

Of course all of us want to have a happy life but how do we succeed in achieving that happiness? These suggestions may help. Not really that hard to do but I guess some of us tend to take things for granted. Think about it....

1. Marry the right person. This one decision will determine 90% of your happiness or misery.
   
   
2. Work at something you enjoy and that’s worthy of your time and talent.
   
   
3. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
   
   
4. Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.
   
   
5. Be forgiving of yourself and others.
   
   
6. Be generous.
   
   
7. Have a grateful heart.
   
   
8. Persistence, persistence, persistence.
   
   
9. Discipline yourself to save money on even the most modest salary.
   
   
10. Treat everyone you meet like you want to be treated.
    
    
11. Commit yourself to constant improvement.
    
    
12. Commit yourself to quality.
    
    
13. Understand that happiness is not based on possessions, power or prestige, but on relationships with people you love and respect.
    
    
14. Be loyal.
    
    
15. Be honest.
    
    
16. Be a self-starter.
    
    
17. Be decisive even if it means you’ll sometimes be wrong.
    
    
18. Stop blaming others. Take responsibility for every area of your life.
    
    
19. Be bold and courageous. When you look back on your life, you’ll regret the things you didn’t do more than the ones you did.
    
    
20. Take good care of those you love.
    
    
    

89/66 and LV

Last Saturday morning, I made an attempt to be a good member of the society. I decided to donate my blood. Impressed with mrjones who already donated more than 6 times, he lost count because he lost his old blood donation book, I followed him to Pusat Darah Negara at Jalan Tun Razak. The centre is just beside our National Library.

So that morning, I polished off baked macaroni leftovers freezed from the last day of fasting month last 2 weeks to prepare myself to donate blood. At PDN, I followed the standard blood donation protocol. Nurse pierced one of left hand finger to determine blood type and weighed me. I’m an A type and weighed 51kgs which pass the minimum requirement of 45kgs.

She then asked me to fill up the form consisting of my biodata and list of questions pertaining to my health condition. I found out that if you have lived in the UK, Scotland, Ireland, Wales, Isle of Man and Isle of Wight from 1980 til 1996, you are permanently barred from donating blood. I can’t remember from which year living in Europe that also bar you from donating blood. So, trueblue, concreterose and yum yum, I think you guys are off the hook ! I also conveniently left blank the space which asks me about my occupation. I’m in the phase of telling anybody new that I’m not working. As housewife only...

Okay, sorry for deviating from the story path. After the compulsory interview, I was given a number for my turn to check my blood pressure. As usual, I miss my turn cos I went to the toilet but nevertheless, I get my blood pressure checked.

Hah ! I’m not cleared to donate cos my pressure is too low. On average, I’m at 54. Patutlah ambil my readings berkali-kali. Then, she gave me two options, either to eat at the room inside or come back again next time. So, I opt to eat cos mrjones doesn’t mind waiting. Food is only a piece of butter cakes and a pack of Julie’s cookies with hot milo. While I was eating the butter cake reluctantly (I hate butter cakes), mrjones joined me. His blood pressure was also low !! Tee hee....

I checked my blood pressure again and twice at that. Alas, I was not cleared to donate. My pressure is still low and pegged at 89/66. She doesn’t want me to faint after drawing my blood. ‘Tak pe, nanti in the future you boleh datang try derma...it’s normal for women to have low blood pressure. Untuk kehidupan sehari-hari, you memang okay tapi not okay untuk derma darah....’

Patut la I asyik sakit kepala je and selalu ngantuk..low blood pressure rupanya..last time, I tak boleh derma cos berat badan tak cukup. Now, blood pressure tak cukup pulak. Agaknya I was not meant to be a blood donor..

Last night I have the weirdest dream. I dreamt that my sister-in-law to my second brother opened a Louis Vuitton boutique. It was soooo exciting tapi barang2 semua mahal. I remember looking at one small handbag costing RM 5720 !! Wah dalam mimpi pun boleh ingat harga..the sling bag jer dah 15k plus ! My family semua complain at her cos barang semua mahal sangat. Husband dia siap merayu, bagi la staff discount cos he wanted to buy the pen. Apa da hal ? LV ada buat pen ke ?? Mengarut betul. My sister-in-law replied ‘tak boleh bagi discount la, HQ tak bagi punya...’ Lagi mengarut, my sister-in-law engaged Mawi as its ambassador. So Mawi dapat all the travelling bags..Cis kau jebat !!! Bangun pagi tadi, terus terpikir, mimpi apa la tu....
Syoknya kalau buka butik satu, tak yah susah-susah fikir pasal datang keje or answering to your boss.

Thank God its Friday?

Friday evenings are supposed to end with smiles, excitement, joy and happiness because the weekend is near. But why do I feel so depressed??

Was looking forward to a good weekend. For the past one month my thoughts have been about one thing..worried that I wouldnt get it done on time. But now since that is over..I’m worried about something else.

Had a discussion with boss earlier and we went through the team’s workload from November to March next year. Something new was added to our plate and we have learnt to deal it with it...to take it as a challenge. But it doesnt really help when the bigger boss keeps breathing down our neck..wanting to know every single detail...every single timeline...Goes to show how much confidence he has in us. I guess he’s worried that we wont be able to keep up with his ever changing needs. The problem with this department is that there’s so many things to do. We can’t really focus. And its really unfair to expect miracles on something thats just been passed to us. Baru nak focus and concentrate on a particular assignment, ada benda urgent lain pulak kena buat *sigh*. How la like that..

With all these tight deadlines and new tasks being added on, I’m just worried the team wont be able to deliver our tasks by next year. I have a feeling my PPA is gonna be crap. I can just imagine it now...

Oh well, I guess I shouldn’t complain much. I know the rest of the staff are feeling the pressure. We have to be strong and move on. At least we have each other and there's always laughter to be shared around. God bless us all............

Have a good weekend everyone.

The most beautiful number in the universe

1.618 - phi
Fibonacci sequence - a progression in which each term is equal to the sum of the two preceding terms 1-1-2-3-5-8-13-21

Phi also was derived from the Fibonacci sequence - a progression famous not only because the sum of adjacent terms equalled the next term but because the quotients of adjacent terms possessed the astonishing property of approaching the number 1.618

Phi has the role of fundamental building block in nature. Plants, animals and human beings all possessed dimensional properties that adhered with eerie exactitude to the ratio of phi to 1.
The ancients assumed the number phi must have been preordained by the Creator of the universe. Early scientists heralded 1.618 as the Divine Proportion.

Female bees always outnumbered male bees and if you divide the number of female bees by the number of male bees in any beehive in the world, you always get the same number - phi.
Nautilus - a cephalopod mollusc that pumps gas into its chambered shell to adjust its bouyancy. The ratio of each spiral’s diameter to the next is phi.

Leonardo da Vinci’s famous male nude - The Vitruvian Man - named after Marcus Vitruvius, the brilliant Roman architect who praised the Divine Proportion in his text De Architectura.
Da Vinci was the first to show that the human body is literally made of building blocks whose proportional ratios always equal phi.

Measure the distance from the tip of your head to the floor. Then divide that by the distance from your belly button to the floor. Guess the number you get ?
Measure the distance from your shoulder to your fingertips. Then divide it by the distance from your elbow to your fingertips.Hip to floor divided by knee to floor. Each of us is a walking tribute to the Divine Proportion.

Chaos of the world has an underlying order. When the ancients discovered PHI, they were certain they had stumbled across God’s building block for the world and they worshipped Nature because of that. And one can understand why. God’s hand is evident in Nature, and even to this day there exist pagan, Mother Earth-revering religions. Many of us celebrate Nature the way pagans did and don’t even know it. May Day is a perfect example, the celebration of spring...the earth coming back to life to produce her bounty. The mysterious magic inherent in the Divine Proportion was written at the beginning of time. Man is simply playing by Nature’s rules and because art is man’s attempt to imitate the beauty of the Creator’s hand, there are a lot of instances of the Divine Proportion.

Greek Parthenon, the pyramids of Egypt, the United Nations Building in New York, organizational structures of Mozart’s sonatas, Beethoven’s Fifth Symphony, works of Bartók, Debussy and Schubert. Stradivarius used it to calculate the exact placement of the f-holes in the construction of his famous violins.

Formally known as pentagram or pentacle, as the ancients called it - this symbol is a five intersecting lines that formed a five-pointed star. It is considered both divine and and magical by many cultures. Because when you draw a pentagram, the lines automatically divide themselves into segments according to the Divine Proportion.
The ratios of line segments in a pentacle all equal phi making this symbol the ultimate expression of the Divine Proportion. As a result, the five-pointed star has always been the symbol for beauty and perfection associated with goddess and the sacred feminine.

I felt bored staying in Penang thus The Da Vinci Code entertained me. I have to play helpful daughter-in-law, at the same time dodge myself from mean remarks ranging from ‘bila nak balik bertiga?’ to ‘ooo...duduk kat damansara rupanya, tak pandai makan sambal belacan la ni...’ Grrrr !!! I can take chili many times pedas than you capable of, buster !

Either Penangites are a bunch of mean people or they have dark sense of humour...

Trueblue...Baby, I love you...

Listening to Madonna's Trueblue. There's a song about me!!! Hehehe..This song brings back fond memories of my younger days...

Anyway, Trueblue (thats me!) is all smiles now. Why? Because my budget stress is nearly over...Soon..soon..soon...This morning I was nearly in tears because the bosses kept changing the figures. Have to stayback again today to wait for the system to update the changes. And 5 minutes ago I printed the last report for submission!!! Yeah!!!

Okay, have to organise all the reports now...and pass to the big boss to sign tomorrow.....Please..please..please...no more changes! Wish me luck guys....

Time to go...

Pack up...Drive home...Have dinner...Tonight my all time favourite show: ALIAS is on....More smiles...... :)

"True Love
You’re the one I’m dreaming of
Your heart fits me like a glove
And I’m gonna be true blue baby I love you..."

*Trueblue signing off now...and still smiling...*

Craving for Vanilla Ice Cream

Got this from the internet. Kind of interesting. Not necessarily true but this is just for fun la..

Pick your favourite of the ice cream flavors listed below and find out what it says about your personality.

1. Vanilla

2. Chocolate

3. Butter pecan

4. Banana

5. Strawberry

6. Chocolate chip

Analysis:
1. If you like vanilla, you are colorful, impulsive, a risk taker who sets high goals and has high expectations of yourself. You also enjoy close family relationships. Gregarious, lives a hectic life. Easily suggestible, expressive, idealistic; a private person.

(Prototype: lovelorn housewife)

2. If you like chocolate, you are lively, creative, dramatic, charming, enthusiastic and the life of the party. Chocolate fans enjoy being at the center of attention and can become bored with the usual routine. Seductive, well-dressed, extroverted, easily influenced, a follower, intuitive, enjoys intimate relationships.

(Prototype: feminine woman, macho man)

3. If you like butter pecan, you are orderly, perfectionist, careful, detail-oriented, conscientious, ethical and fiscally conservative. You are also competitive, aggressive in sports and the take-charge type of personality.

(Prototype: executive, secretary)

4. If you like banana, you are easy going, well adjusted, generous, honest and empathetic.

(Prototype: the perfect husband, wife, parent or child)

5. If you like strawberry, you are shy, yet emotionally robust, skeptical, detail-oriented, opinionated, introverted and self critical. Easily made to feel guilty; cranky, pessimistic, low self-esteem.

(Prototype: bureaucrat, journalist)

6. If you like chocolate chip, you are generous, competitive and accomplished. You are charming in social situations, ambitious and competent. A visionary, a conqueror, enjoys being catered to, a go-getter, intolerant of defeat.

(Prototype: Industry leaders, voted most likely to succeed in school)

The flavorology research also compiled a compatibility chart for ice cream lovers.

If your favourite flavour is:

Vanilla - you are most likely to be compatible with someone whose favourite flavour is vanilla.

Chocolate - compatible with butter pecan or chocolate chip.

Butter pecan - compatible with butter pecan, chocolate and chocolate chip.

Banana - compatible with all flavours.

Strawberry - compatible with chocolate chip.

Chocolate chip - compatible with butter pecan or chocolate.

So....who likes vanilla ice-cream???

As promised.....

It was back in the year 2000. Was having coffee with a friend and we were talking about relationships. She was with her boyfriend for about 2 years at the time. She asked me "How do we know we’ve found the right person? How do we know we’ve found our soulmate?". Honestly, I don’t know..Its hard to explain, I guess we just know, huh?....For some people, they really take time to fall in love...some people, its like love at first sight. What about those people who claim they love their partner even before they met him/her? You know, like the song by Savage Garden, "I knew I loved you before I met you, I think I dreamed you into life....". I have to admit the lyrics are really sweet but is that even possible? Can we actually do that..I mean dream of the person that you will fall in love with someday? Hmm...On second thought, yes, I think its possible. I guess we imagine a person with all the qualities we want and pray we meet him/her. Hoping that the person will step into our life....

Coming back to my friend’s question..."Is he the one? Is he my soulmate?". I read in an article somewhere where this person asked a psychic that very same question. His answer was simple.."If you have to ask, then he’s not the one". He went on to explain that with soulmates no matter how good or bad a day you have together, you wake up in the morning knowing without a doubt that this is the one and you go to bed at night knowing without a doubt that this is the one. Nothing that happens in between those two points can change your mind.

How would one define a soulmate? Probably someone you were meant to spend the rest of your life with? Someone you want to grow old with? The original roots of the concept go back to a belief in reincarnation. A soulmate is someone that you have encountered in many different life times and have loved many times. That’s why the first time you meet them in this lifetime you feel as if you’ve known them forever before you even know their name. Some people even feel a mystical deja vu energy right from the start.

There are couples out there who we can obviously see are so, so, so in love with each other. Even after like 20 years of marriage, we can still see they are devoted to each other. I’m not saying other married couples don’t love their partners but these couples..its like, when you see them together, you can’t stop smiling and feel so happy for them. Some couples openly show their affection like berkepit 24 jam, pegang sana, pegang sini, peluk sana, peluk sini as if their bodies ada magnet and they have to hold on to each other all the time. Sometimes naik meluat jugak tengok. But I’m not talking about these couples. I’m talking about couples who don’t necessarily have to be together all the time but when they are together, we can instantly see how much love they have for each other. From the way they look into each other’s eyes, the way they talk..*sigh* I so, so admire these people. Such loving couples and they look so sweet together. I think one example is our very own Prime Minister, Pak Lah and his late wife Allahyarhamah Datin Sri Endon. When she died, Pak Lah was devastated. We can see it from his eyes. He was so in love with her. I think these people are classic examples of soulmates.

Some people say, soulmates have such a strong bond that when the other dies, the likelihood of marrying again is very slim as no one can replace what they had before. Hmmm..but what about those people who believe they have found their soulmate but due to some certain difficulties cannot be together yet? Would they be willing to wait for their true love?

Back in the orientation days, I had 2 friends who became couples (*azman* and *aleya*). One of them went to USA and the other went to UK. Maybe due to the long distance, they broke up. Later on both of them went out with different people. 9 years later, when it was time for *aleya* to come back to Malaysia to work, coincidentally she joined the same department as*azman*. And the funny thing was she had to understudy him because he was going to leave the company. I guess their relationship rekindled after that. We were a bit upset at first about this because at the time *aleya* was going out with another good friend of ours. But I’ve come to realise now we shouldn’t be judging and blaming her. Maybe she had her own reasons and didn’t want to share with us. Anyway, I had a chat with *azman* later on and asked him "Isn’t it weird after all these years, you and *aleya* are back together?". He replied "*Aleya* is my soulmate..I knew we were gonna be together in the end". I just smiled.....And soon after that, they got married.

Having said all this, I have a few friends out there who complain they have no one, still not married because they haven’t found the right match. Some people may get so obsessed with this soulmate thing. No one is perfect, right? Can’t be too picky. It will only bring you loneliness and heartache if you insist on waiting for perfection. For those people who are still looking for love, the best advise I can give you if you want an amazing forever kind of love is to be healthy, happy, and independent. Quit worrying about when love will find you and get busy with living your life. Keep your heart open and your eyes open for the possible love of a lifetime, but don’t obsess over it. What is meant to be will be whether you call it to you or not. Trust that the rest will fall into place in it’s own perfect time. Your time will come... :)