As promised.....

It was back in the year 2000. Was having coffee with a friend and we were talking about relationships. She was with her boyfriend for about 2 years at the time. She asked me "How do we know we’ve found the right person? How do we know we’ve found our soulmate?". Honestly, I don’t know..Its hard to explain, I guess we just know, huh?....For some people, they really take time to fall in love...some people, its like love at first sight. What about those people who claim they love their partner even before they met him/her? You know, like the song by Savage Garden, "I knew I loved you before I met you, I think I dreamed you into life....". I have to admit the lyrics are really sweet but is that even possible? Can we actually do that..I mean dream of the person that you will fall in love with someday? Hmm...On second thought, yes, I think its possible. I guess we imagine a person with all the qualities we want and pray we meet him/her. Hoping that the person will step into our life....

Coming back to my friend’s question..."Is he the one? Is he my soulmate?". I read in an article somewhere where this person asked a psychic that very same question. His answer was simple.."If you have to ask, then he’s not the one". He went on to explain that with soulmates no matter how good or bad a day you have together, you wake up in the morning knowing without a doubt that this is the one and you go to bed at night knowing without a doubt that this is the one. Nothing that happens in between those two points can change your mind.

How would one define a soulmate? Probably someone you were meant to spend the rest of your life with? Someone you want to grow old with? The original roots of the concept go back to a belief in reincarnation. A soulmate is someone that you have encountered in many different life times and have loved many times. That’s why the first time you meet them in this lifetime you feel as if you’ve known them forever before you even know their name. Some people even feel a mystical deja vu energy right from the start.

There are couples out there who we can obviously see are so, so, so in love with each other. Even after like 20 years of marriage, we can still see they are devoted to each other. I’m not saying other married couples don’t love their partners but these couples..its like, when you see them together, you can’t stop smiling and feel so happy for them. Some couples openly show their affection like berkepit 24 jam, pegang sana, pegang sini, peluk sana, peluk sini as if their bodies ada magnet and they have to hold on to each other all the time. Sometimes naik meluat jugak tengok. But I’m not talking about these couples. I’m talking about couples who don’t necessarily have to be together all the time but when they are together, we can instantly see how much love they have for each other. From the way they look into each other’s eyes, the way they talk..*sigh* I so, so admire these people. Such loving couples and they look so sweet together. I think one example is our very own Prime Minister, Pak Lah and his late wife Allahyarhamah Datin Sri Endon. When she died, Pak Lah was devastated. We can see it from his eyes. He was so in love with her. I think these people are classic examples of soulmates.

Some people say, soulmates have such a strong bond that when the other dies, the likelihood of marrying again is very slim as no one can replace what they had before. Hmmm..but what about those people who believe they have found their soulmate but due to some certain difficulties cannot be together yet? Would they be willing to wait for their true love?

Back in the orientation days, I had 2 friends who became couples (*azman* and *aleya*). One of them went to USA and the other went to UK. Maybe due to the long distance, they broke up. Later on both of them went out with different people. 9 years later, when it was time for *aleya* to come back to Malaysia to work, coincidentally she joined the same department as*azman*. And the funny thing was she had to understudy him because he was going to leave the company. I guess their relationship rekindled after that. We were a bit upset at first about this because at the time *aleya* was going out with another good friend of ours. But I’ve come to realise now we shouldn’t be judging and blaming her. Maybe she had her own reasons and didn’t want to share with us. Anyway, I had a chat with *azman* later on and asked him "Isn’t it weird after all these years, you and *aleya* are back together?". He replied "*Aleya* is my soulmate..I knew we were gonna be together in the end". I just smiled.....And soon after that, they got married.

Having said all this, I have a few friends out there who complain they have no one, still not married because they haven’t found the right match. Some people may get so obsessed with this soulmate thing. No one is perfect, right? Can’t be too picky. It will only bring you loneliness and heartache if you insist on waiting for perfection. For those people who are still looking for love, the best advise I can give you if you want an amazing forever kind of love is to be healthy, happy, and independent. Quit worrying about when love will find you and get busy with living your life. Keep your heart open and your eyes open for the possible love of a lifetime, but don’t obsess over it. What is meant to be will be whether you call it to you or not. Trust that the rest will fall into place in it’s own perfect time. Your time will come... :)