Laughter is the best medicine

People who know me well know that I absolutely love laughing. Its so easy to get me to laugh. Just tell me something funny and I’ll crack up. For some people, it may not be that funny but for me, it could be the funniest joke in the world and it’ll take me some time to stop laughing. There are times when I’m sitting alone and I remember a funny joke/moment/situation, I can just burst out laughing. And people nearby will think "eh..why la this girl gelak sorang-sorang?".

Because of the fact that I love laughing, I am easily attracted to guys with great sense of humor...guys who can make me laugh. Its certainly one of the qualities I look at. And when I say attracted, it doesn’t mean I easily fall for any funny guy (of course I can’t now coz dah kawin kan...). But I definitely know I can easily get along with that kind of guy.

I read somewhere that if we want to find Mr Right, we need to pay close attention to his laugh. Some people may find that weird but in a way, I kind of agree and based on my personal experience, I can relate to what the writer said. We can tell a lot about a man by his laugh. Real laughter is uncontrollable. For just a moment something strikes us as funny and the sound of laughter comes out spontaneously and without any real control on our part. Laughter can also be faked and thats the part we can analyse when we’re listening to his laughter. Lets look at a few things on a guy's laughter....

1. Is his laughter real or fake?

You can always tell when someone has one of those completely goofy laughs that nobody in their right mind would choose to have -- those silly sounding laughs that cause everyone else to laugh too. This reminds me of my manager, *Hashim*. He’s such a funny guy and when he laughs, he makes this funny kind of wail that makes me want to laugh even more. Hehehe.. There’s also those completely fake laughs that makes you want to cringe. Most people have fairly normal sounding laughs and they are spontaneous. If the guy you’re interested in fakes his laugh occasionally to laugh at someone’s attempt to tell a joke, that’s okay. But, if he fakes his laugh on a regular basis, then we should question his ability to portray his true and genuine self to the world. You may or may not feel like analyzing why he’s faking it, but it’s important to note if he’s presenting a false personality to the world on a regular basis.

2. Does he laugh easily?

There are men who have serious anger and violence issues. They don’t laugh easily. Also, guys who have serious depression problems obviously aren’t going to laugh as easily as someone who’s naturally happy and at peace with his life. The silent type may seem sexy for a while, but in the long run, you’re going to want to have some fun in your life too. It gets to be a real bore to hang out with someone who’s always incredibly serious and entertaining darker thoughts.

3. Does he laugh at people or with people?

Nobody likes to be made fun of, but this has more to do with what your man finds as funny. Does he find humour in ridiculing others? Does he laugh at others because everyone is incredibly foolish or stupid in his eyes? Is he constantly critiquing people looking for a reason to laugh at them? It doesn’t matter how witty or funny his presentation, it’s not a good sign if your man takes his personal pleasure in laughing at others. Some people can't take jokes easily. What seems funny to him may not be funny to other people. We need to be sensitive to other people’s feelings. Jokes about weight, appearance and looks should be avoided. Some people say its ok if the joke is coming from your close friends but for me, if you say the same joke and tease the person about the same thing every other day, it can be a pain and will definitely hurt the person’s feelings. You also don’t want someone who constantly makes himself the butt of all jokes either. Its an underlying self esteem issue when people spend a lot of time making fun of themselves. Its not the same as being able to laugh at one’s own mistakes. This is about constantly putting yourself at a low level. Also, is he able to find joy in someone else’s jokes? You don’t want someone who only laughs at his own jokes and nobody else’s.

4. Does the sound of his laughter fill you with joy?

Listen to the actual sound of his laughter. Does the sound make your heart jump with joy? It doesn’t matter if his laughter is like a roaring thunder or if he giggles like a little girl! What matters is that his laughter is infectious and makes your heart lighten. Imagine coming home from a really bad day at work. Upon entering the house, you hear his laughter coming from the kitchen. Does that sound lift your spirits? Or infuriate you even more? You want to be with someone who’s laughter makes your heart sing. So, choose someone who’s laughter heals your weary mind.

5. Do you laugh at the same things?

Yes, you want to be your own person with your own interests and your own unique sense of self, but you also want to share good times with your partner. You need to pick someone who has a similar sense of humour to your own. There’s nothing worse then having your partner roll their eyes like you’re so uncool every time you burst out laughing. What determines a person’s sense of humor is wide and varied, including upbringing and level of education. If you share the same overall sense of humor, chances are that you are fairly compatible in those areas. You’re somewhat on the same wave length.

6. Do you laugh at the same time?

This is also something that needs close attention. You want to pretty much agree on when is the proper time and place for goofing around and making each other laugh. If he likes to crack jokes and laugh a lot during foreplay and you find it to be a total turn off, then you’re going to have problems. If he keeps laughing at something when you’re trying to have a serious conversation, then you’re not going to get along so well. This also works in the other direction. If you’re the one who is constantly laughing and joking and he’s the one getting upset that your timing is inappropriate, then you’re not going to like hanging out with him. Compatibility shows itself in little things like timing.

Going through the list above, of course whatever mentioned is also true when finding Mrs Right. There are other qualities that we need to look at but there’s no harm either to take note of how he/she laughs. For those who are still looking for your Mr/Mrs Right, look for someone who’s laughter heals you rather than grates on your nerves. And make sure you both laugh together and often. It’ll get you both through the tough times.

At least thats what I think.... :)